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Bimwe mu Bibazo by'Urukundo n'Ibisubizo byabyo

Uko umubano waba umeze kose ntushobora kuburamo agatotsi, bisobanuye ko yaba wa mubano abantu baba bavuga ko ukomeye cyangwa se hahandi abantu baba bavuga ko ari umubano umaze igihe kandi umeze neza, ntibishoboka ko abantu babana nta kibazo bagirana hagati yabo. Umunyarwanda yaravuze ngo “ntazibana zidakomanya amahembe”, ashaka kumvikanisha ko umubano uwo ari wo wose uzamo amatati n’ibibazo, icya ngombwa kikaba uko abantu basohoka muri ibyo bibazo. Hari ibibazo bimwe na bimwe bikunze kugaragara hagati y’abakundana, tukaba tugiye kubagezaho uburyo bwiza bwo kubisohokamo.

1. Kutaganira hagati y’abakundana

Kuganira ni kimwe mu bibazo bikomeye bijya bikunda gusenya imibanire y’abantu. Abantu benshi ntibazi kuganira na bagenzi babo, ndetse usanga n’ababikora babikora mu buryo budasobanutse. Kugira ngo umuntu ashobore kubwira mugenzi we icyo amutekerezaho usanga ari ibintu bitoroshye cyangwa se niba hari ibintu abantu batumvikanyeho ugasanga ntibafashe umwanya ngo babiganireho, babishakire igisubizo. Iyo abantu baticaye ngo baganire, bagire imyumvire imwe ku kibazo nta kabuza bizakurura amakimbirane hagati yabo.

Ubu ndi rero mu rukundo, cyangwa se muri buri mubano, habamo utubazo kandi tworoshye gukemura iyo twamenyekanye. Niba wamaze kubona ko umubano wanyu ufite ikibazo cyo kutumvikana biturutse ku biganiro bike cyangwa kukutaganira neza, ugomba kureba uburyo bwiza waganirizamo mugenzi wawe. Igihe muganira, gerageza kuvuga igitekerezo cyawe mu buryo bworoshye kandi busobanutse maze nurangiza utege amatwi ibyo mugenzi wawe agusubiza , urebe ko yakumvise neza cyangwa se ko atakumvise. Muri uko kuganira, havuka mo ibisubizo kandi bibanyuze mwese.

2. Kwikubira bikabije n’ishyari

Hari igihe abantu babana umwe yikunda cyane akumva arashaka ko ibintu byose byaba ibye noneho igihe bibaye kuri mugenzi we akumva amufitiye ishyari ntiyongere kumwishimira. N’ubwo ibi bukunze kugaragara cyane ku bantu bahuje igitsina, biranashoboka ku bakundana n’ababana nk’abashakanye. Urugero: Niba muri inshuti mukaba mukora akazi kamwe, umwe akaba yumva ko ari we waba umuyobozi cyangwa akumva ari we bazamura mu ntera, hazamuka mugenzi we akamugirira ishyari ubwo ibyo kuzongera kumusekera cyangwa kumuvugisha neza bikaba birangiriye aho. Niba rero ikintu nk’iki cyo kwikubira cyangwa kugirana ishyari cyagaragaye mu mubano wanyu mugomba kugikemura mureba ikintu kibitera. Umuntu ashobora kuba ariko ateye, ni ukuvuga ko ari yo kamere yo kwikunda no kugira ishyari, cyangwa se ugasanga abikomora ku babyeyi cyangwa se ku bantu bigeze kubana. Iyo umaze kumenya igitera iyo myitwarire, ugomba rero kumenya uburyo witwara kuri mugenzi wawe noneho ukagenda umuhindura buhoro buhoro, umwereka ububi bw’ibintu akora, bityo nawe azagenda ahinduka gake gake. Iyi nzira ni nziza cyane aho kugira ngo umwivumbureho ngo uhite umwanga.

3. Hari igihe usanga ibyo wifuzaga ku muntu atabifite

Abantu benshi bakunda kubana buri wese hari icyo atezeho undi. Hari abo bihira ibyo bifuza bakabigeraho ariko hari n’abandi basanga baribeshye. Iyo rero basanze baribeshye usanga bibaviramo ubwumvikane buke bagatangira gusuzugurana no kubwirana nabi. Gusa ariko, iyi nzira ntabwo ifasha mu gukemura ikibazo ahubwo birushaho kugikomeza. Niba rero ikibazo nk’iki kivutse, banza ushyire ibyifuzo byawe n’ibyo wari witeze ku ruhande maze ubanze urebe uko wakuzuza ibyifuzo bya mugenzi wawe. Namara kubona ibyifuzo bye bikemutse azatangira gushaka uburyo nawe yakemura ibyawe, maze mwembi munyurwe.

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